Saturday, 30 March 2013

Bus note 47

Some very drunk old gents.
Like boys. Almost dapper.
        One FUCK shouted
        over everybody's edgy nerves.
A little girl echoes that starred word
ad infinitum.
        Unstoppable play.
Baby scratches on civil skin.
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6 comments:

  1. Anonymous30 March 2013 at 20:53

    I can imagine that...the last line made me smile...

    ReplyDelete
  2. TC31 March 2013 at 12:00

    A jagged punctuation in the series, reminding us of an anxious spikiness that's laced the air all through.

    Civilisation and its discontents screwed widdershins into a single vehicle.

    And the tenor? An itch that can't be scratched. On wheels that might come off at any turning.

    Still the play must go on.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Jonathan Chant31 March 2013 at 12:00

    Yes, another excellent piece in the bus note chronicles. The last line is a blinder. Great stuff WB.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Mose2331 March 2013 at 20:27

    Thank you, Sandra, TC and Jonathan.

    The first three sentences ran into one in the first draft. The fragmentation left it far more pointed.

    Yes, the play's the thing for now.

    ReplyDelete
  5. vazambam (Vassilis Zambaras)1 April 2013 at 06:29

    Kudos--one can't get more pointed.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Mose231 April 2013 at 07:13

    Cheers, Vassilis

    ReplyDelete

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